Dake Staedtler

A wandering stout, arrogant combat healer for hire. Exorcisms by cudgel are free.


Dake Staedtler feels like he was put on this earth by the powers that be for one purpose: to drive the demons from the bodies of others. This is primarily accomplished via his personal sacred cudgel, a stout old root ball that can really do a number on those demons, particularly through repeated blows about the head and neck (though he’s not above a body blow or two, too) to those who he deems infected by the accursed things. These poor souls are only occasionally grateful for his deeds, but the job is reward enough. Well, that and whatever money he can scrape up from his mercenary exorcisms. He doesn’t merely drive them out, however. He strongly believes that demons are drawn to injuries, and that it is important to heal people as quickly as possible to prevent them from being infested by the hellspawn. A typical healing ritual will involve a brief but vigorous session with the cudgel, just to be on the safe side. This will drive out festering demons, as well as make the patient less jumpy about having a limb amputated or arrows removed.

Dake considers himself an abbot, as he is not terribly clear about the actual titles and ranks in the church, but he is not officially affiliated. He’s doing the work of the gods, and feels that staying in a particular church would only hinder his holy mission. Also, all that paperwork and blessing babies and stuff is for people who don’t have his powers of exorcism. They’re all fine folk, for the most part, but they aren’t really accomplishing anything in Dake’s mind. Not being bound by the church also allows Dake the moral freedom to indulge in fine food, fine drink, and fine women, and he does so with wanton abandon. He’s willing to drop them when the need for an exorcism arises, but it’s immediately back to his gluttonous ways once the poor victim has the holy lumps on their heads and black eyes to show where the demons escaped from. They might want to put a poultice on that, it’ll help keep the demons out longer.

He’s also an arrogant bastard, Dake is. He considers what he does far more important than what most other people do, and he figures few are up to his holy task. He’ll show respect to nobles who actually seem useful, same with members of the church, but he considers himself the shepherd of the flock of humanity, and sometimes you need to kick a sheep or two in the rump to get them out of the way. Sheep are kinda stupid.

He does much of his best work on the battlefield. It’s a demon’s playground, a battlefield. Lots of avenues for demons to enter a body that need closing, and so a good place for exorcisms. Also, a good way to make money. People fighting wars tend to pay you good money when you heal up their soldiers. He’ll typically hang back with the cooks, barbers, prostitutes, and dogs that always follow armies during the actual battles, but if need be he’s not afraid to get his hands dirty. Needless to say, demons can’t infect the dead, so sometimes he’s gotta use a battleaxe instead of his cudgel. Once the main threat looks mostly dealt with, he’ll wander back to the rear and indulge in some wine and possibly some fine sausages and cheeses. (It’s best to get them before the battle is over, otherwise you might have to wait in line with the soldiers, and Dake’s not overly fond of waiting.)

He likes when people call him Abbot Dake or Father Dake, because again, he’s not terribly clear on what official church ranks should be like. He tends to go through money quickly due to his gluttony, and he can be a bit abrasive (and downright abusive in the name of exorcisms) but there are few better companions to have by your side when it comes time to fight. He’ll get you on your feet again as well as beat the living daylights out of your assailants.

Dake Staedtler

New World Jim TheDourSalmon